How To Master Your Fears: Build the Life You Deserve

The Inspiring Journey of Wizard Liz: From Struggles to Success

Lize Ddzjabrailova, widely known as Wizard Liz, grew up in a turbulent household. Her father’s abusive control overshadowed the family’s life, leaving her mother—a university graduate fleeing a war-torn homeland—to shoulder their survival in a foreign land.

Amid language barriers and low-paying jobs, her mother persisted, even securing work in a male-dominated field. Meanwhile, Liz, witnessing her father’s refusal to contribute, stepped up. She worked long hours as a waitress while balancing school and family responsibilities, enduring abuse for her late hours. Yet, her resilience grew with every hardship.

Her father’s betrayal—pushed her mother to finally leave. Though the separation brought relief, Liz faced years of rebuilding, eating disorders and overcoming depression. She realized that no savior was coming. The responsibility for her future lay solely with her.

Liz’s journey of self-education, mindset shifts, and relentless effort eventually led her to create a thriving platform on YouTube, empowering millions of women. Her story isn’t one of miracles but of grit, determination, and the courage to master her fears and build the life she deserves, despite unimaginable odds.

Confident woman taking a mirror selfie in an orange top, symbolizing mastering her fears and building the life she deserves.
” the more a woman invests in herself the more successful she becomes.”

Like Wizard Liz, every woman carries fears that can either paralyze her or push her forward. The answer to how to master your fears? You need to understand where these fears come from and why they hold you back.

Understanding the Root of Your Fears

Fear isn’t just emotional—it’s neurological. The brain’s fear center, the amygdala, learns to react based on past experiences. But here’s the empowering truth: what’s been wired can be rewired.

Thanks to neuroplasticity, to master your fears and build the life you deserve, you need to trace your fears back to their roots.—when you give them a name and a story—you actually begin to weaken their grip. According to research from the National Institute of Mental Health, reflection and exposure can reduce your brain’s automatic fear responses, allowing you to respond with clarity instead of panic.

A. Identify Your Core Fears

1. Recall the first time you remember feeling this fear.

Ask yourself:

  • “What exactly am I afraid of?”
    Is it failure? Rejection? Judgment? Being misunderstood? Not being good enough?

2. Ask yourself: What’s the worst that could happen if this fear came true?

This is where honesty meets courage.
Ask:

  • “If this fear became reality, what would actually happen?”
  • “What would I feel? What would I do next?”

You’re not catastrophizing—you’re grounding the fear in reality. Often, we realize the fear is a story… not a truth.

3. Write down what you believe would happen if that fear materialized.

This helps you uncover your inner script.
You might find beliefs like:

  • “If I fail, everyone will think I’m a joke.”
  • “If I speak up, people won’t like me.”

Don’t judge yourself—just observe. Honesty about your fears and weaknesses isn’t a flaw; it’s the foundation for growth. The more you avoid them, the more you disconnect from yourself. And that disconnection? It’s what breeds the quiet, crippling anxiety of not feeling safe in your own skin.

B. Trace the Origins

Understanding your fear means going beyond what it is now — and uncovering where it first took root. Every fear has a story behind it. Sometimes it began in a single moment, or it was built slowly over time.

1. Recall the first time you remember feeling this fear.

To master your fears, you need to understand them. Look back and ask yourself: When did this fear first show up?

This isn’t about digging into heavy emotions or past trauma. Instead, it’s a gentle reflection to help you see that fears often start from specific experiences or messages we received — and knowing this makes them less mysterious and more manageable.

2. Ask yourself: “Who or what made me believe this fear was real?”

Think back to the earliest moment you can remember feeling this fear. It might be a small memory from childhood, a mistake you made, a critical comment, or an expectation someone placed on you.

Don’t rush it. Let the memory come naturally, like flipping through old photo albums in your mind.

3. Write a short paragraph about that moment.

  • Who or what made me believe this fear was true?
  • Was it a comment from a parent, a teacher, or society’s standards?
  • How did that moment shape what I believe about myself today?

Describe the scene, how you felt, and what you believed about yourself afterward. Be honest—but kind. This isn’t about blame; it’s about understanding.

When you see that your fear started from outside messages or moments, it stops feeling like a permanent part of who you are. Instead, it becomes something you learned—and because you learned it, you can unlearn it too.

C. Recognize How Fear Shows Up

When fear stays hidden, it can sneak into your decisions and hold you back without you even realizing it. But when you learn to recognize how it shows up, you gain the power to pause, understand what’s happening, and take control.

1. Look for Physical Signs

Fear often shows up in your body first. Do you notice any of these?

  • Tight chest or shortness of breath
  • Sweaty palms or clammy hands
  • Headaches or stomach aches
  • A racing heart or feeling jittery

Write down any physical sensations you regularly experience when you feel uneasy or scared.

2. Notice Emotional Signs

Fear also affects your feelings. These might include:

  • Self-doubt or second-guessing yourself
  • Feeling overwhelmed or stuck
  • Worrying about what others think
  • Feeling sad, anxious, or restless

Take a moment to list the emotions that come up when fear is near. Take a moment to list the emotions that come up when fear is near. Notice if they show up often in certain situations—like when you’re about to try something new, speak your mind, or step outside your comfort zone. The goal isn’t to fix them right now, but to become familiar with them. Naming them is a quiet act of self-awareness—and that’s powerful.

3. Observe Behavioral Signs

Finally, pay attention to how fear influences your actions. Do you catch yourself:

  • Avoiding opportunities or challenges?
  • Playing small instead of speaking up?
  • Procrastinating important tasks?
  • People-pleasing to avoid conflict or rejection?

Write down any behaviors you notice that might be fear-driven. You’re not blaming yourself here—you’re simply getting honest about the ways fear may be steering your actions. And with that awareness, you can start choosing differently.

When you understand where your fears come from, why they exist, and how they show up in your life, you take back the power to rewrite the story they’ve been silently telling you. And that awareness? It’s the first real step toward creating the life you truly deserve.

Stand Up to Fear—And Do It Anyway

Now you know your fear. You see it coming. And you feel it in every nerve in your body. Let it come. Let it sweat your palms, make your heart pound. But here’s the thing—take the step anyway. Fear thrives in silence and avoidance. Speak. Move. Act—even if it’s shaky. That’s how you show your brain that fear doesn’t get to call the shots.

Take the Opposite Action

Fear says hide. Confidence says try.

If fear tells you, “Don’t speak,” raise your hand anyway. If it says, “Don’t start,” take the first small step. You don’t need to feel ready—you just need to act.

Each time you do something your fear told you not to, you weaken its grip. Even shaky action is powerful.

Visualize Success

Most people rehearse failure in their minds without realizing it. Flip the script.

Before doing the thing that scares you, pause and imagine it going well. See yourself showing up, speaking up, and standing tall. Let your mind practice confidence before your body follows. Write an affirmation to ground yourself as the fear kicks in, and take the step despite it.

Give Yourself Grace

It won’t be perfect—and it doesn’t need to be.

You might stutter. You might feel awkward. That’s okay. Growth isn’t always graceful. When fear shows up, meet it with self-kindness. Remind yourself: “I’m proud of me for trying.”

Your Fear Doesn’t Define You—Your Response Does

Fear is a universal human experience, but it’s also one of the most misunderstood. Like Wizard Liz, you might carry deep fears shaped by your past or by voices that told you who you couldn’t be. But today, you’ve learned that your fears can be understood, traced, and—most importantly—rewired.

Building a life of your own design doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a journey of small, courageous steps, taken even when your knees are trembling. Each time you choose honesty over avoidance, self-belief over doubt, and action over paralysis, you’re giving your brain the evidence it needs to believe: This is who I am now, and this is what I stand for.

Research indicates that consistent, small acts of courage can literally rewire our neural circuits, gradually shifting our default responses from avoidance to approach. According to studies on exposure therapy and fear extinction, every time you step toward what you fear—even in small ways—you teach your brain that it’s safe to try, that you can cope, and that fear no longer needs to dictate your choices.

Remember: Your fears were learned—and they can be unlearned, too. Each step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward the life you truly deserve. Fear may not vanish overnight, but every time you act in the face of it, you prove to yourself that you are stronger than the stories that once held you back.

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